LOVE.

Love....this seems to be the time of year to discuss the prevalent theme of the holidays. People are making up, breaking up, hooking up, shacking up etc. It seems when ever it starts getting cold everyone wants some one next to them to keep them warm. And honestly loving, being in love and just love in general are and is a pretty amazing emotion. Some one recently said to me, “Sandy look at all your past relationships that haven’t worked out, you must have not been very successful with the whole dating thing,” This kind of stunned me, and really made me think long, hard, and very deeply about the past relationships I have been in. And what did I come up with spending time thinking back to all the wonderful people good or not that I was lucky enough to be in relationships with? Honestly it made me smile, the fact that I was able to experience Love so many times in the short life that I have lived not puppy love but real, unfiltered, unadulterated, 100 percent true love. Some people ask me, “but yeah you’ve been in love but haven’t you been hurt a lot as well”? The answer to that question is yes, but honestly the more I experience being in love all the hurt seems to just fade away knowing some day ill have another chance to experience it again and that’s really what I think its all about every steep is one that much closer to being with the one I will be with for the rest of my life. I’ve watched ex’s of mine get engaged, married and honestly find true happiness and even though it seems cliché I’m truly glad that to be apart of the steps they had to take to be with the one who completes them. So what am I trying to say by writing all of this....Love is amazing, and honestly I just love to love in general in what ever aspect that maybe. I really think Love in general just produces a calming effect in all of us that cannot be rivaled by anything. Love a word mentioned between 208-508 times alone in the bible depending on your version.....Hey Jesus....I think you were on to something...

Sometimes Things Get Worse Before They Get Better

My Situation continues to get worse, but my sprit seems to be getting better. The situation as it stands now is I have no money in the bank, 189 cell phone bill 144 storage and around 215 to get my car running again, and no food in my apartment and no money to even eat. So far I managed to get a job and started yesterday but I really won’t start making money till next week. Again you think I would be severely depressed and down, but for some reason I’m just fine its funny how stupid all your other priorities look when you just trying to eat everyday. Even though this is a bad situation God is really teaching me a valuable lesson that taking my cross up and following him should be my number 1 priority and that if I leave absolutely everything to him I will truly be taken care of. I look back to the person I used to be before 8 months ago and there would have been no way I would have been able to handle this, God really does give us everything when we have nothing and the power to get through anything that comes our way, even though things continue to get worse I know something better is just around the corner I just need to stay patient and wait on the Lord to bring it to me and not the world, and currently I have no regrets about anything I’m doing all I can and the best I can now its just up to God....

The story here lately...

Things have been so crazy here lately; it seems that everything I do recently has ended up backfiring on me. Every attempt to get things straight has resulted in the road becoming full of curves, two steps forward and 3 steps back. My situation as of now is I have 10.00 in my bank account, just got laid off, and have about 400 bucks in bills to pay, 300.00 to fix my car that’s been sitting in my apt. parking lot now for 2 weeks, and no hope in sight to get things taken care of until next semester starts. Due to all of this I made a decision to accelerate my plans and join the Army as of last Wed. I swore in and am no longer a civilian, I go to basic may 12th come back go my last semester and graduate then off to AIT training in Texas. So now comes the hard part....waiting and trying to get things squared away until I can get some serious income in Jan. Honestly you would think with all of this happening I would be super stressed out and at the end of my rope. But for some reason I just feel like everything is going to end up being ok one way or another, God is seriously taking care of me emotionally and is really giving me something to lean on through this tough time. I really owe everything I’ve ever had/have to him, it seems these days I’m learning that the less I have the happier I am.....